Monday, March 13, 2017

4 Vacation Bible Bootcamp Day 2



Turns out day 1 of Arts and Crafts ("A&C") was just amateur hour for Day 2 when the kids got their picture taken, bedazzled the shit out of a picture frame and then got their printed picture put in it at the end. That's right, Rita has me packed for the apocalypse and here St. A's is operating a photo booth that any over-the-top wedding reception would be proud to include.

I was an official glue gun operator in these highly organized proceedings (those damn frames don't bedazzle themselves, by god.) My assignment is ironic because I thought we were here to resolve injuries, not cause them.  Apparently word has yet to travel to Ecuador that not every lesbian knows how to use power tools....

And we can call it arts and crafts, but to these kids it is Life. And. Death.  They have a PLAN and it often involves me being WAY too slow on the glue gun. Honestly, I spent 20 whole minutes being a 7-year-old's BITCH while she pointed and I glued. Don't let that little smile fool you, toughest boss I've ever had>



And the bedazzling is nothing compared to the picture posing. There seems to be some confusion about whether we are a church group or Latina Vogue. More than one sassy-pants threw a look over her dipped shoulder that took us quite a few minutes to adequately crop out of the final picture.

The only mishap seemed to occur when the morning snack delivery came around. I told you those empanadas were good. And a certain glue gun operator MAY have left her post so as not to miss the first or second pass of the empanadas. And a six-year-old MAY have glued his shoes together while my glue gun was otherwise unattended. 

And THAT is how I keep getting busted to latrine duty. 

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