More Vegas

More from my weekend trip to Vegas [if you didn’t read the Liberace post – you may want to start there and come back to this post]. Rita couldn’t make it, but my high school friends Melissa & John came up with a killer itinerary (somebody is watching them some Food Network) [Really…when you don’t spend 16 hours standing at a craps table giving money away, you get to see all KINDS of things in Vegas.]

First, our post-Liberace hunger was satisfied by a world-famous Stromboli from the TV show “Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives.” [Our destination was proudly representing the Dive category, I’m guessing.] After paying for the taxi to and from the [very] off-Strip location, we figured we had just had a $75 Stromboli….but, ummm, fyi….worth it.

Our breakfast the next day featured Snickers flapjacks [You heard me right. It’s a “Man vs. Food” favorite. You may not know the show…but think about a food that is suitable for battle – and you get the picture.] This one was so good that my friend Melissa told her husband they should make it at home for the kids. To which he replied…”that’s right honey, for the kids.”

And I now know a real-live person who has eaten a deep fried Twinkie. And in a rare moment of restraint – it’s not me. The judgment seems to be that the 99 cents is a bargain. Of course, I lost $10 in a slot machine while we were waiting for the oil to heat…so it was really an $11 Twinkie [much more in line with its true value].

But it wasn’t ALL fine food. My off-Strip lodging was just as exciting [did I mention that Rita wasn’t with me?]. I seemingly booked the hotel room right next to the 21-year-old spring-breakers. At least they all went out for the night about the same time I went to bed. Unfortunately, my neighbor “Angela” had the unfortunate habit of passing out each time her boyfriend went down the hall for ice…requiring him to stand at the locked door at 4 a.m. shouting at her like Rocky until another neighbor yelled at him to “shut the fuck up, asshole”. [Obviously – all the Priceline customers got the same floor at my hotel.]

Next trip – I’m only playing craps at the places with deep-fried Twinkies.