Nashville Strong

I know everyone has had their ration of Covid battles over these past few months, but I feel like Nashville is working on extra credit in the apocalypse sweepstakes.  The city has not only been battling the same pandemic as everyone else, but also dodging locusts and equestrian foursomes.  In the space of eight weeks, we have had a tornado, the end of honky-tonks as we know them, and “straightline winds”.  I didn’t even know what “straightline winds” were – but have now learned its shorthand for “destruction of power lines”.  For Nashville, 2020 has been a shit-weather sandwich with a side of economic catastrophe.

I know I have been quick to use the word “smiting” during this pandemic….but when it comes to Nashville, I have to think if the curse fits….  I swear we’re paying the price for all those bachelorette parties.  [But it’s good for business!  The bachelorette-industrial complex!]

The first round of tornadoes happened right before the whole world went dark. Back when you were pretty sure the roof blowing off your house was as bad as it got.  But then a week later Nashvillians were ordered to shelter in place….but what if you no longer had a place??

Then you spend 8 weeks confined to your house before a batch of sideway winds take out half the power lines in town.  You think quarantining is hard.  Try doing it without power.  Or Netflix.  Or….coffee.  I said coffee.  Zoom seems annoying until the alternative is carrier pigeon.  My poor sister spent 30 minutes a day sitting in her car siphoning off battery power in order to daisy chain 24 hours’ worth of updates into a handful of text messages.  It’s no wonder she feels like a war correspondent.  

If the rest of 2020 has been any indication, I am betting murder hornets are planning their very own Nashville bachelorette party soon.