Birthday list

I forgot to mention that little vacation that this blog was going to take, didn’t I? I do that to my boss All. The. Time! But I am back on track now and just in time for a special BIRTHDAY edition. That’s right – it’s time for the top 10 things I want for my birthday…

• My money back on that skirt for Rio that I will never wear again.
• A day that doesn’t start on east coast time and finish on west coast time.
• The name of someone to replace the cleaning lady that fired Rita (and by Rita, I mean me).
• Confirmation that that is REALLY “happy birthday” Rita is saying in Italian.
• A permanent address. A single permanent address.
• Nothing. Really. Not a thing [but you can get Southwest drink coupons on the internet]
• Well, no one came through for Rio, so I’m still in the market for that new ass.
• A ticket out of the dog house for that innocent suitcase blog. World-wide-web, indeed.
• According to Rita…her presence is her present. Y’know…you’re right….that really isn’t all that funny.
• No offense brother…but my own birthday.