Friday, February 19, 2010

Critters

My mom has critters…and we’re not talking dogs and cats. No…my mother has raccoons [plural] in the attic of her house. [I keep telling mom that wild animals do not make good pets, but nonetheless, her house has officially become….Nana Annie’s Raccoon Spa and Nocturnal Feast-aporium]

And how do we discover these little bastards are crawling around up there? Because some daughter takes an exhausting trip home, visits all day and then lays down to sleep in the upstairs bedroom….where she is buffeted by the pitter-patter of a gaggle of coons scurrying above. Did I mention overhead? Aiiiieeeeeeee And the dogs just LOVE it. I had to move downstairs after Molly had a nervous breakdown from hysterically chasing the ceiling from one end of the house to the other.  Not to mention that once embedded, asbestos is easier to remove than those little $^#%@.

Cue…~“the Critter Guy”~

The Critter Guy [these are real jobs, people!] has been out about a dozen times tending to the matter and trying to plug all the places they may be getting in. Turns out that bashing the heads of these little suckers [my suggestion for dealing with them] runs afoul of certain animal welfare laws, so they have to be “resettled”.  As of two weeks ago, the Critter Guy has removed 6 (!) different raccoons from the attic of mom’s house.  Ummmm...for those keeping score at home...that’s 200 lbs of varmint hanging out overhead. After resettling the first 5 raccoons, however, the Critter Guy didn’t charge mom for the last one. Seriously? Buy 5, get 1 free. And I am pretty sure the Critter Guy is my mother’s new BFF. I don’t know if “the Critter Guy” is his real name, but I think that’s how he’s going to show up in the will. He’s even ahead of my brother in the Love Game.  =)

6 raccoons, 1 insulation re-install and a homeowner’s insurance claim later…we THINK they are all gone.

3 comments:

Lola! said...

That's unbelievable! I've never heard of a raccoon infestation before!!

Shrinky said...

Hey, save and toss one my way, I've never seen a real live racoon before (so long as they don't need any walking, yeah?)..

Susan said...

Nope no raccoons in the attic, just eating in the kitchen.
We had skunks under the house and didn't notice until we saw them in the garden! DH trapped five babies and the mama. He released them in the forest. The next spring, he trapped two more skunks!

Susan
http://susan-potpouri.blogspot.com/