Jetblue

I try to emulate an episode of the Amazing Race every weekend that I can. Therefore, THIS weekend’s scavenger hunt of a travel itinerary included touching all four corners of the country and making it back to Nashville in time to file taxes. How DOES one get from Lawng Eyelund to Portland OR? Jetblue can deliver you safely in 7 hours (!) – and that’s including the requisite hour and a half on the JFK tarmac (Jetblue loves them some tarmac-waiting). Y’know, when I travel for 7 hours…I’ve come to expect a helicopter ride at the end of it.

But flying Jetblue…shew…I DO kind of feel like I am cheating on Southwest…I don’t know – it’s not like Southwest and I were exclusive. I mean…ever since that business class flight to Rio…Southwest and I just haven’t been as close.

There’s a tv at every seat of Jetblue…with live TV piped in!! An assigned seat AND Law and Order reruns…I may never leave. My excitement, however, may have been a tad unwarranted… Do you know what’s on that personal, live TV during a Friday night flight…ummm…nothing. We’re talking women’s collegiate bowling….THAT’S what’s on Friday night TV. [I originally had a comment in here about scholarships to female college athletes…but given the demographics of “my readership”…I decided it best to skip that comment]. But I will say this…a rigorous cardio program is obviously NOT a big part of the collegiate bowling regiment. Judging by the team’s physiques, there is a decent chance that Bud Selig hasn’t cleaned up steroids in THIS sport either. Not only could these “girls” beat Obama by about 250 pins, but I think they could beat the crap out of his secret service detail to get to him in the first place.

Another interesting thing about Jetblue is that the waitresses, I mean flight attendants (!) ONLY take credit cards (no cash) for the…ummm…the snacks that you order. Wait a second…I am totally going to have a $33 charge from Jetblue show up on my expense report?? Can you make that show up as “internet access” just like the Marriot did? The [waitresses] flight attendants did look a little funny trotting through the aisles with those mobile credit card machines…not unlike an Artrageous volunteer =) By the way, what’s every.single.reader of this blog doing November 8th? Cause there’s NO WAY I am going to be able to trick Rita into volunteering for Artrageous again this year.

Southwest OR Jeblue, though,…the waiters are still gay.

Back home to Nashvegas tomorrow…it’s a tax day pilgrimage.